Issue link: https://viewer.e-digitaledition.com/i/762897
12 December 15 • 2016 Ronelle Grier | Contributing Writer T he proximity of Chanukah to the Christmas season makes it challenging for parents to turn their children's attention toward the spiritual aspect of the holiday. With so much emphasis on gift- giving, what can families do to make the holiday less materialistic and more meaningful? Here are some ideas from local parents who have managed to do just that, along with some tips on teaching children to appreciate the true meaning of Chanukah from family and mar- riage therapist Dr. Natasha Kendal. As a child grow- ing up in Israel, where giving elaborate gifts was not the custom, Rachel Kapen of West Bloomfield received the tra- ditional gift of Chanukah gelt, or money. "The custom of buying expen- sive gifts for Chanukah obviously began because of the proximity to Christmas," Kapen said. "Growing up in Eretz Israel and then the State of Israel, we didn't have this proximity … so, every Chanukah, we kids used to go to a few of our parents' good friends and family to get our tradi- tional Chanukah gelt." Kapen has continued this tradition with her grown children and grand- children, who are scattered across the country, by sending each grand- child a small check they can use to buy something for themselves. "Albeit not exactly the Chanukah gelt of my childhood, it is still not the intention to equate Chanukah and Christmas, two holidays that have nothing in common," she said. Tali Wendrow of West Bloomfield, who was also born in Israel, grew up feeling as if she were on a "different planet" from her American-born friends whose holiday consisted of nightly gifts, usually culminating in a large present, such as a bicycle. "I was like 'What?! That's crazy'," she said. "We just lit our candles, ate latkes and got small token gifts and the chocolate gelt. I'm cool with that, and it's pretty much what we've done with our kids who are now 22 and 23." Serving dinner to the homeless people housed at Temple Israel has become a holiday tradition for Fawn and Adam Chayet of West Bloomfield and their children, Matthew, 16, and Abby, 12. "We also donate gifts to Children's Hospital in Detroit. My kids have fun shopping and picking out new games and toys to donate … I've always wanted my kids to know the holiday season is about giving … not getting," Fawn said. Lisa Ziff 's daughters, Shay, 12, and Brooke, 9, select eight of their own toys each Chanukah season to donate to underprivileged children. metro » Family and marriage therapist Dr. Natasha Kendal Tips to keep Chanukah meaningful for children. Season The Reason For The